We recently got the chance for a sitdown interview with our newest spokesperson – and oldest user.
Meet Death, the original sole trader.
Thanks so much for your time, we really appreciate it. To kick things off – how did you become a sole trader?
Hey, no problem! I’ve actually got nothing but time.
In my gut, I think I always knew I was the only one for the job. Becoming the Grim Reaper, it was my calling. So when the opportunity came to take up the scythe, I seized it – both hands.
Ultimately it’s a classic case of supply and demand. You’ve got souls floating around, uncollected, wreaking all sorts of havoc, haunting the bajeezus out of everybody – I think people would struggle to get any work done if I wasn’t there, collecting them.
Mind you, it started off slow – in the beginning, there wasn’t a lot of life around, hence not a lot of work. But I stuck to it, kept my wee business afloat in the storm as it were (there was one time it rained for like, 40 days. Busy busy busy!), and here we are! Thriving.
Ah, no sorry – how did you become a sole trader? You know, like, sole. Solo.
Oh! Sole, gotcha. Now that’s a real test of my memory. Let’s see… I guess I became a sole trader around the same time that trade was invented?
Going solo though, that was a no-brainer. It’s just me on the job (the dogs join me in the car occasionally) so going through the rigmarole of registering a company seemed like way too much hassle. All that paperwork! Does my head in. Plus, there’s the extra tax obligations – more complicated forms to fill out, more paperwork to do, more financial stuff to manage. It’s too much. Being a sole trader keeps things smooth, simple.
I have tried hiring apprentices in the past, but for one reason or another it’s never really worked out… They do tend to die. The whole mortal thing, you know? You know.
But even when I did hire an apprentice, I could still take them on as a subcontractor, or even a full-time employee if needed, without having to actually register a company. It’s just not worth the faff.
Right… But there would be some hassle in being a sole trader, right? It’s not all a bed of roses.
Don’t get me wrong, I love my job – I honestly don’t think I could do anything else. But, like any job, the work itself has its ups and downs. Ebbs and flows. There were some great times for sure. Black Death? Business was booming. But the invention of antibiotics? Abysmal.
Then, what was it, 5500 years ago, bloody taxes came along, and made everything way harder than it needed to be. Now I’ve gotta think: “Did I save those receipts?” And then by the time I’ve remembered that I actually need to claim them, 100 years have passed and they’ve all turned to dust! You wouldn’t believe how many thousands of dollars I’ve missed out on over the aeons, just because I keep forgetting to claim my bloody expenses. I have other things on my mind – the system’s just not practical for me.
But now with Hnry? That’s all out the window. Amazing, life saving. For me, that is. Not my customers.
Haha, thanks, we love hearing that *awkwardly clears throat*. Um. How have you found sole trading since signing up for the Hnry service?
I love this question. Look, I’ve seen some pretty amazing things in my time, and Hnry is right up there. It just makes my “life” so much better.
I don’t even have to think about taxes any more. With the new Hnry Debit Card, expenses get claimed on the fly – it raises an expense in the app, I upload a photo of my receipts, then just throw them in the bin. No more receipt dust all over my house.
I like using Hnry’s Allocations feature to split my income up into different buckets, too. It’s how I make sure I have money for what I need, when I need it. Paying for dog food? Allocation. Maybe I want a holiday one day? Allocation. Saves me from spending all my money on scythes. Honestly, I have too many.
Speaking of which, we’re actually kind of curious – how do you get paid?
Well it used to be in any number of ways – salt, livestock, beads. These days, it’s dollars directly into my Hnry Account. Good to have it all consolidated. No drama. What am I going to do with a cow?!
No, like, who pays you? How does it all work? We have to ask
Let’s just say, if I let that cat out of the bag, we’d all be covered in scratches.
Right, sorry. Forget we asked. Easy one to finish up – what’s the best thing about being a sole trader?
For me, it’s freedom. I see people working the office 9-5 and I just think “Nope, that’s not for me.” I love to get out and about, feel the sun on my bones and just enjoy the world. Also, I get to meet a lot of lovely people. Very briefly, but it’s nice all the same.
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